[00:11.81]Uncle Marshall!
[00:13.92]Will you tell us a bedtime story?
[00:18.82]Here we go...
[00:20.46]Now once upon a time not long ago
[00:22.98]There was a little rapper about to blow
[00:25.19]But his album came and it was not good
[00:27.40]I think it went lead or double copper wood
[00:29.48]So the silly little fans they were mislead
[00:31.76]By a nerdy internet computer hip-hop head
[00:34.07]"Me and you, 'Clef, we're gonna make some cash
[00:36.34]Grab the silver paint and let's paint my ass"
[00:38.64]Hey mister, would ya care to bare witness to
[00:40.93]The ass-whippin' I'm about to administer
[00:42.88]To this ass-kissin' little ******l blister
[00:45.25]Stanabis, little Marshall Mathers' sister
[00:47.56]And in this corner, we have the mister
[00:49.65]Not havin' it, it's the mad sinister
[00:52.04]Dr. Evil with his bag of tricks for
[00:54.23]this little antagonist ****** ****-suckin'
[00:56.53]Ex-LL Cool J fan from Windsor
[00:58.69]I'm 'bout to murder little Kenny fag Keniff-sta
[01:00.92]You bastard I ain't wanna have to diss ya
[01:03.15]Canabis, where the **** you at? I miss ya!
[01:05.49]Can-i-*****, oh Can-i-*****
[01:07.60]Where for art thou Can-i-*****?
[01:09.85]Please tell me what happened with
[01:12.02]That style that you were rappin' with
[01:14.27]Can-i-*****, oh Can-i-*****
[01:16.51]Are you from Los Angeles
[01:18.67]New York or just a janitor
[01:20.86]From Canada? Oh Can-i-*****
[01:23.25]Now at first I ain't really understand the shit
[01:25.28]Picture me for a second and imagine it
[01:27.43]Chillin' in the Bat-Mansion and relaxin'
[01:29.57]When all a sudden some bullshit comes across the scanners
[01:32.02]It's Can-i-***** on some "Stan Lives" shit
[01:34.25]It creeped me out at first. Man this is sick
[01:36.58]For me, being just a sick, this conflict
[01:38.78]Gets my **** harder than arithmetic
[01:40.70]And I know how you jealous ones envy
[01:43.03]I shoulda knew better from the first few letters you sent me
[01:45.61]The first two letters you were tellin' me shit
[01:47.56]Like you respect me, like any other regular MC
[01:50.06]The third letter you ask how come I ain't return
[01:52.21]None of the messages at Shady Records you left me
[01:54.51]The fourth letter: "Slim, you really startin' to upset me!"
[01:56.72]The fifth letter told me you were comin' to get me
[01:58.96]The sixth letter there's a bomb threat in our building
[02:01.19]This crazy mother****er's really tryin' to kill me!
[02:03.28]So I went back and read the first few letters that said
[02:05.98]Some shit about a message you left
[02:07.73]Oh shit, that's not an "E" that's an "A"
[02:10.04]This dude wants to leave me a "massage," he's gay!!
[02:12.31]Right away I'm on the phone with Dr. Dre
[02:14.38]We got a bogey! (Marshall I'm on the way)
[02:16.86]Can-i-*****, oh Can-i-*****
[02:18.90]Where for art thou Can-i-*****?
[02:21.24]Please tell me what happened with
[02:23.52]That style that you were rappin' with
[02:25.74]Can-i-*****, oh Can-i-*****
[02:27.96]Are you from Los Angeles
[02:29.88]New York or just a janitor
[02:32.21]From Canada? Oh Can-i-*****
[02:34.61]So in two seconds flat Dre's at my crib
[02:36.67]The funny thing is we both know where this kid lives
[02:38.88]And neither one of us have Canadian citizenship
[02:41.15]Shit. Oh Dre, wait a mintue that's it
[02:43.42]All we gotta do is use a bit of turbo boost
[02:45.61]We can fly over the border "Let's go" [WOOSH!]
[02:48.00]So we're off to Toronto and we're gainin' speed
[02:50.16][BOOSH!] (What was that? Oh) Jermaine Dupri
[02:52.37]**** It, keep goin' no time to waste
[02:54.58]Wait, backup hit him one more time in case
[02:56.80]Okay .. **** now he's draggin' under the car
[02:59.02]Oh well, only 30 more thousand miles
[03:01.27]Meanwhile me and Dre are tryin' to conversate
[03:03.46]Just tryin' to find a reason for the constant hate
[03:05.74]And tryin' to figure out what happened to 'Germaine Propaine'
[03:08.11]"He couldn't have fell off that hard" Ain't no way
[03:10.29]"What happened to the way you was rappin' when you was scandalous
[03:12.71]That Canibus turned into a television evangelist"
[03:14.92]Plus he raps with his regular voice [BOOSH! BOOSH!]
[03:17.39][BOOSH! BOOSH!] (What was that?) Pet Shop Boys
[03:19.12]So we pull up to the bridge where he last was spotted
[03:21.40]His corpse was still movin' but his ass was rotted
[03:23.67]He kinda smelled a little like Courtney Love
[03:25.92]I figure if I stick him with a fork he's done
[03:28.14]So I stabbed him twice, kept jabbin', Christ
[03:30.30]He won't die, this guy's like a battered wife
[03:32.50]He's like Kim, he keeps comin' back for more
[03:34.89]But he won't fight back I cracked his jaw
[03:37.11]Hold up, 'Bis quit foldin' up!
[03:39.25]Punch me in the chest! Make my shoulders touch!
[03:41.55]Do somethin'! At least one punchline
[03:43.81]C'mon till the meter reads 9-9-9-
[03:46.44]ty-nine percent of my fans are blonde
[03:48.31]'Bis c'mon answer me man respond!
[03:50.47]Tell me 'bout the sun rain moon and stars
[03:52.83]Intergalatical metaphors from Mars!
[03:54.91]Raw to the floor, raw like Reservoir Dogs
[03:57.44]Bite another line from Redman's song!
[03:59.48]Suddenly the stub from a dead man's arm
[04:01.70]From a midget reaches out from under the car
[04:03.75]It's JD, this mother****er won't die neither
[04:06.14]Dre starts sprayin' him with cans of ether
[04:08.43]We stomped the ***** and then stopmed the ***** again
[04:10.76](Compton!) Detroit *****! Talk some shit again!
[04:12.97]Stomp him! (switch feet) Stomp him! (switch again!)
[04:15.11]Dre alright he's dead dog, quit kickin him!
[04:17.33]I think Stanabis jumped off the bridge again (Damn)
[04:19.65]He disappeared yo he's gone he did it again
[04:22.02]Can-i-*****, oh Can-i-*****
[04:24.00]Where for art thou Can-i-*****?
[04:26.28]Please tell me what happened with
[04:28.50]That style that you were rappin' with
[04:30.56]Can-i-*****, oh Can-i-*****
[04:32.96]Are you from Los Angeles
[04:34.98]New York or just a janitor
[04:37.21]From Canada? Oh Can-i-*****
[04:39.96]