Never Getting Laid
 作词 : John Ryan/Sabrina Carpenter/Amy Allen
 作曲 : John Ryan/Sabrina Carpenter/Amy Allen
 We were so happy, why not mix it up?
 I'm so at peace, yeah, I can't drink enough
 No way to know just who you're thinking of
 I just wish you didn't have a mind

 That could flip like a switch
 That could wander and drift
 To a neighboring bitch
 When just the other night
 You said you need me, what gives?
 How did it come to this?
 Boy, I know where you live

 Baby, I'm not angry
 I love you just the same
 I just hope you get agoraphobia some day
 And all your days are sunny
 From your windowpane
 Wish you a lifetime full of happiness
 And a forever of never getting laid

 I think this schedule could be very nice (Very nice)
 Call up the boys and crack a Miller Lite
 Watch the fight
 Us girls are fun but stressful, am I right?
 Am I right?
 And you got a right hand anyway (And only yesterday)

 Was when we called it quits (Called it quits)
 I was so confident (Confident)
 Till the thought of it hit
 That any given night you could be using your lips
 On a girl with big tits
 Boy, I know where you live

 Baby, I'm not angry
 I love you just the same
 I just hope you get agoraphobia some day
 And all your days are sunny
 From your windowpane
 I wish you a lifetime full of happiness
 And a forever of never getting laid

 Forever
 A forever of never getting laid

 At the end of the rainbow
 I hope you find
 A good whole lot of nothing
 'Cause you're still inside
 And abstinence is just a state of mind