Okay children quiet down, quiet down Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day His name is Mr. Shady Children quiet down please Brian don't throw that （SHUT UP!）Brian Mr. Shady will be your new substituteShady Good luck Mr. ShadyShady Hi there little boys and girls （**** YOU!） Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob （Huh?） Say hi Bob! （"Hi Bob"） Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom and he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot but his twelve-year old brother looks up to him an awful lot And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spotBob and wait in the parking lot for waitresses off the clock when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks （AHH!） And even if they escaped and they got the cops the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge 'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr." He grabbed S tace' by the legs as chopped it off her and dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander they never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner And that's the story of Bob and his *********, and what it might do to you So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon） and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man） and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right） She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will） So kids say no to drugs （that's right） So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh） Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along） Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay? My ***** is the size of a peanut, have you seen it? **** NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut （Huh?） Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels? Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid and spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back Meet Zach, twenty-one years old After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold and decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive and his eyes roll back in his skull {blblblblblb} His back starts tah - look like the McDonald's Arches He's on Donald's carpet, layin horizontal barfin {BLEH}他在Donald的地毯上， And everyone in the apartment starts laughin at him "Hey Adam, Zach is a jackass, look at him!" cause they took it too, so they think it's funny So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money Meanwhile, Zach's in a coma, the action is over and his back and his shoulders hunched up like he's practicin yoga And that's the story of Zach, the ecstasy maniac So don't even feed that to squirrels class, cause it's bad for you See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon） and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man） and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right） She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will） So kids say no to drugs （that's right） So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh） Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along） Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay? And last but not least, one of the most humungous problems among young people today, is fungus It grows from cow manure, they pick it out, wipe it off, bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff And everything slows down when you eat some of 'em.. And sometimes you see things that aren't there （Like what?） Like fat woman in G-strings with orange hair （Mr. Shady what's a G-string?） It's yarn Claire（Mr. Shady Women stick 'em up their behinds, go out and wear 'em （Huh?） And if you swallow too much of the magic mushrooms Whoops, did I say magic mushrooms? I meant fungus Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue （How come?） cause it comes from a cow's dung （Gross!!） See drugs are bad, it's a common fact But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at （Oh!） But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D. They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to grow a goatee and get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault So don't do drugs, and do exactly as I don't, cause I'm bad for you See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon） and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man） and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right） She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will） So kids say no to drugs （that's right） So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh） Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along） Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay? Come on children, clap along （SHUT UP!） Sing along children （Suck my ************ ****!） Drugs are just bad, drugs are just bad （South Park is gonna sue me!） So don't do drugs （Suck my ************ *****!） so there'll be more for me （Hippie! God damnit!） （So, ****** up, right now..）
[00:01.98]Okay children quiet down, quiet down [00:05.12]Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day [00:09.53]His name is Mr. Shady [00:11.87]Children quiet down please [00:14.36]Brian don't throw that （SHUT UP!）Brian [00:15.54]Mr. Shady will be your new substituteShady [00:20.39]Good luck Mr. ShadyShady [00:22.25]Hi there little boys and girls （**** YOU!） [00:23.70]Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels [00:26.48]But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Bob （Huh?） [00:28.64]Say hi Bob! （"Hi Bob"） Bob's 30 and still lives with his mom [00:32.03]and he don't got a job, cause Bob sits at home and smokes pot [00:33.87]but his twelve-year old brother looks up to him an awful lot [00:37.50]And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spotBob [00:39.49]and wait in the parking lot for waitresses off the clock [00:42.14]when it's late and the lot gets dark and fake like he walks his dog [00:45.28]Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks （AHH!） [00:47.59]And even if they escaped and they got the cops [00:50.16]the ladies would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge [00:53.11]'til one night Mrs. Stacey went off the job [00:55.22]when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk [00:58.22]But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off [01:00.78]But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker [01:03.23]Crazier than Slim Shady is off the vodka [01:05.70]You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a "Dr." [01:08.72]He grabbed S tace' by the legs as chopped it off her [01:11.29]and dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her [01:13.96]But ever since the day Stacey went off to wander [01:16.65]they never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner [01:19.20]And that's the story of Bob and his *********, [01:21.69]and what it might do to you [01:23.46]So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you [01:25.44]See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon） [01:27.41]and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man） [01:30.34]and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right） [01:32.59]She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will） [01:35.10]So kids say no to drugs （that's right） [01:38.13]So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh） [01:40.62]Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along） [01:43.17]Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay? [01:45.92]My ***** is the size of a peanut, have you seen it? [01:48.66]**** NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut （Huh?） [01:51.42]Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels? [01:54.67]Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world [01:56.37]If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it [01:58.72]Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid [02:01.68]and spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back [02:04.18]So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back [02:06.53]Meet Zach, twenty-one years old [02:09.07]After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold [02:12.03]and decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys [02:14.62]and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it [02:17.65]Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive [02:20.89]and his eyes roll back in his skull {blblblblblb} [02:22.65]His back starts tah - look like the McDonald's Arches [02:25.60]He's on Donald's carpet, layin horizontal barfin {BLEH}他在Donald的地毯上， [02:27.39]And everyone in the apartment starts laughin at him [02:30.18]"Hey Adam, Zach is a jackass, look at him!" [02:32.62]cause they took it too, so they think it's funny [02:35.36]So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money [02:38.03]Meanwhile, Zach's in a coma, the action is over [02:40.30]and his back and his shoulders hunched up like he's practicin yoga [02:43.56]And that's the story of Zach, the ecstasy maniac [02:45.85]So don't even feed that to squirrels class, cause it's bad for you [02:49.57]See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon） [02:51.79]and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man） [02:53.91]and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right） [02:56.20]She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will） [02:59.08]So kids say no to drugs （that's right） [03:01.93]So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh） [03:04.53]Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along） [03:07.56]Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay? [03:09.61]And last but not least, one of the most humungous [03:13.19]problems among young people today, is fungus [03:15.43]It grows from cow manure, they pick it out, wipe it off, [03:17.90]bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it [03:20.57]Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff [03:23.15]And everything slows down when you eat some of 'em.. [03:26.47]And sometimes you see things that aren't there （Like what?） [03:28.79]Like fat woman in G-strings with orange hair [03:31.11]（Mr. Shady what's a G-string?） It's yarn Claire（Mr. Shady [03:33.70]Women stick 'em up their behinds, go out and wear 'em （Huh?） [03:37.02]And if you swallow too much of the magic mushrooms [03:39.68]Whoops, did I say magic mushrooms? [03:42.05]I meant fungus Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue （How come?） [03:45.97]cause it comes from a cow's dung （Gross!!） [03:47.95]See drugs are bad, it's a common fact [03:49.45]But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at （Oh!） [03:52.50]But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D. [03:55.11]They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to grow a goatee [03:57.65]and get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault [04:00.39]So don't do drugs, and do exactly as I don't, [04:02.53]cause I'm bad for you [04:04.10]See children, drugs are bahhhd （c'mon） [04:06.23]and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd （ask him man） [04:08.86]and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom （that's right） [04:11.14]She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time （she will） [04:14.14]So kids say no to drugs （that's right） [04:16.86]So you don't act like everyone else does （uh-huh） [04:19.82]Then there's really nothin else to say （sing along） [04:22.17]Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay? [04:25.40]Come on children, clap along （SHUT UP!） [04:27.31]Sing along children （Suck my ************ ****!） [04:29.64]Drugs are just bad, drugs are just bad （South Park is gonna sue me!） [04:31.73]So don't do drugs （Suck my ************ *****!） [04:34.11]so there'll be more for me （Hippie! God damnit!） [04:50.74]（So, ****** up, right now..）
